Am I unhinged? Or the victim of a predator?

Women who become targets of a long-term predatory grift are not drawn in by random chance. Manipulative operators rely on specific psychological profiles, life transitions, and ideological frameworks. Based on the documentation, evidence indices, and behavioral patterns associated with this operational model, the targets typically fall into distinct categories.

1. The Psychographic Targeting Profile

As documented in the operational evidence (such as the target screening criteria identifying individuals who are "40-something, divorced or never been loved"), the grift actively selects for specific vulnerabilities:

• Life Transitions and Isolation: Women navigating mid-life transitions, recent separations, or periods of professional and personal isolation. These individuals are searching for a sense of community, validation, and deep connection.
• The Compassionate Caretaker: Highly empathetic, emotionally generous women—frequently working in caregiving, healthcare, or artistic fields—who are primed to look past red flags, give unconditional grace, and attempt to "heal" or rescue a struggling partner.
• Carriers of Grief or Heavy Burdens: Individuals carrying profound personal burdens—such as navigating family trauma, bereavement, or the intense daily responsibilities of caring for dependents. A predator recognizes that someone already exhausted by heavy life duties has less emotional bandwidth to spot and fight back against slow-creeping manipulation.

2. The Ideological Hook: Progressives and Counter-Cultural Seekers

Operators running alternative-health and "body-positive" fronts rely heavily on attracting politically progressive, open-minded, and art-appreciative women:

• The Body-Positivity and Anti-Prudery Demographic: Women who reject mainstream cultural standards of beauty and want to embrace body liberation, unscripted sexuality, and alternative art (such as participants in projects celebrating diverse body types and ages).
• Holistic Health Seekers: Individuals who feel failed or alienated by conventional medical establishments and are open to alternative therapies, traditional remedies, and natural wellness protocols.
• The Empathy Shield: Because these women deeply value inclusivity, dismantling stigma, and non-conforming lifestyles, they are conditioned to give the benefit of the doubt to anyone claiming to be an "underground pioneer," an alternative healer, or an artist fighting cultural conformity.

3. How the Funnel Captures and Locks Them In

Once a target from this demographic is engaged, the grifter deploys a systematic progression to bind them to the operation:

• The Artistic/Intellectual Validation: Initial engagement is built on deep listening, mirroring the target's values, and making them feel uniquely seen, understood, and elevated through art or shared philosophy.
• The Vulnerability Inversion (The Pity Play): The operator quickly pivots from a position of strength to a manufactured position of scarcity—claiming financial distress, aging fears, or health struggles. This triggers the target's protective instincts, converting a peer dynamic into a caretaker-patient or subordinate dynamic.
• Commodification of Labor and Assets: Under the guise of a "sacred mission," "partnership," or alternative lifestyle arrangement (such as BDSM or assistant dynamics), the target's resources, housing, administrative labor, fine art, and physical modeling are systematically extracted.

Ultimately, the women targeted by this type of grift are chosen precisely because their greatest strengths—their empathy, open-mindedness, loyalty, and capacity to forgive—can be weaponized against them, turning their desire to heal the world into a resource pipeline for a predator.

 

 

Artists must be selfish to succeed

Art, Ego, and the Cost of Greatness

A photographer was chatting with one of my collectors recently and mentioned their discussion about how terrible I am at self-promotion.

It is true. I am much better at promoting everyone else.

My priorities shifted completely the day I gave birth to my miracle. Looking into my newborn son's eyes, I realized my finest creation was right in front of me. All my drawings, paintings, singing, and dancing paled in comparison to my perfect boy.

For the first few years of his life, we spent almost all our time together, usually alone. I introduced him to nature, yoga, dance, music, and art. We ate natural food, stayed away from toxic environments and behaviors, and kept good company. It was a beautiful, simple time. I earned a living making art, practicing calligraphy, and teaching classes at community centers.

The Myth of the Single-Minded Genius

Over the years, I have known many successful artists who are childless, or who left their children behind and have never lived with or near them.

One artist once told me he left his infant daughter to focus on fashion photography, remarking that "you can't get ahead in the fashion industry unless you're single." He walked away from being a stay-at-home dad to chase fame, fortune, and shallow distractions. Another daughter of his lives thousands of miles away, and he has never shared a home with her.

When my son's father left Canada to open a gallery in New Mexico, I still made sure our son called him every single Father's Day. They had an incredible time together when our boy turned 18 and they finally lived under the same roof for two years. All boys need their fathers.

People Over Pedestals

The truth is, people are far more important than one's ego. In my view, all unnecessary suffering stems from self-cherishing.

Consider Pablo Picasso: he left behind a monumental body of work and fundamentally changed the course of modern art, but he also left a personal legacy of pain, destruction, and madness in his wake.

I don't want to be remembered as a great artist if it means I have to be a monster to achieve it. Give me a quiet life, a handful of good memories, and the knowledge that I prioritized love over a monument.

The Male Feminist Façade: A wolf in Feminist clothing

I used to be a hard core feminist. 

I believe in equity, mutual respect, and the dismantling of oppressive power structures. Because of those values, it is particularly disorienting—and infuriating—when you encounter someone who weaponizes that exact vocabulary while practicing the exact opposite behind closed doors.

Then I met a black man, who was a self-proclaimed feminist, and happened to be a sex photographer, master herbalist, and "herpes guru."

Let’s talk about the paradox of the progressive predator.

There is a very specific type of manipulation practiced by men who wrap themselves in the language of social justice, alternative wellness, and enlightened sexuality. They know the script. They know how to talk about bodily autonomy, supporting women, and holding the right ideological stances. They use it as a beacon to draw in people who genuinely care about these values—particularly self-professed feminists who lower their guard because they think they are in a safe, aligned space.

Then, you look at the reality of the daily dynamic.

Behind the public posturing of the conscious, earth-loving healer, the operational model looks less like liberation and more like Andrew Tate. It is a masterclass in extraction: devaluing labor while treating people as currency, weaponizing isolation, eroding self-worth, and maintaining absolute control while playing the perpetual victim. They use the script as bait to draw in vulnerable, affection-starved women, weaponizing intimacy just to feed their own ego and get laid.

I know, I went through it for seven years.

The Bait-and-Switch of Progressive Posturing

When a man builds a brand or a social circle around being an enlightened, sensitive ally—complete with cameras, tinctures, and alternative credentials—it creates an almost impenetrable shield of deniability.

• The Public Persona: Progressive, alternative, right on every ideological trend, surrounded by people nodding along to the wellness rhetoric.

• The Private Reality: High-control dynamics, emotional extraction, boundary dismantling, and a complete refusal to take accountability.

If you try to speak up about the mistreatment, you hit a wall of cognitive dissonance—both from the enablers and often from yourself. How could someone who talks so much about respect, healing, and bodily autonomy treat me this way? Am I the one missing something?

You aren't missing anything. You are simply witnessing the ultimate hypocrisy: using the language of wellness and safety to construct a very effective trap.

Dropping the Illusion

Realizing that someone’s ideology is just a costume is a bitter pill to swallow. It makes you question your own judgment for giving them the benefit of the doubt. But the truth is, I trusted the values I hold dear, and he exploited that trust. I have always supported vulnerable and alternative folks.

I don't need a public confession from him, and I certainly don't need the validation of his flying monkeys; the people still charmed by the performance. The spell is broken. The hypocrisy is out in the open, and I am done auditing a system that was rigged from the start to protect a fraud.

If you’ve ever walked away from a progressive facade and found a toxic, patriarchal reality hiding underneath, trust your inventory. You aren't crazy for seeing through it. You're just finally seeing the truth.